Question
I read with interest the fact that a husband does not need to pay Meh’r if the wife expressly relinquishes it. However I am conscious of the fact that a wife may relinquish her right either out of love for the husband or by reason of her desire not to offend him. In any event I feel that the wife would in most cases waive her right due to emotional pressure. If this is the case, would the husband still be required to pay the Meh’r? ::/wysiwyg_question::
Answer
If the wife relinquishes her right to the payment of Mehr, then the husband is relieved of this obligation. I agree that it can happen that a wife forgoes her right to the payment out of emotional pressures, such as her love for the husband, uneasiness about taking money from him, pressure that he will be upset and so on. However, it should be understood that this is a gift that symbolises the husband’s acceptance of the financial responsibility toward the newly formed family, therefore the husband should give this to her willingly and she should not have any feeling of guilt toward accepting it. The husband must not force her to forgo it or even try to convince her to do so as this will not be acceptable. It is only she who can make that decision on her own. If she decides to indeed forgo it, then he does not need to pay.
I hope this helps,
And Allah (swt) knows best
Hischam Khan
September 30, 2004