Question
My husband bought a house with his mother but the sister, her husband and their 4 children are staying with us in the house. They contribute nothing to the house financially because the sister n her husband do not work, but the sister recieves grants for her children (R1500 p/m). I was brought up in a household of just my parents n siblings. My husbands family are the total opposite of how i was brought up and they dont care about the next ones feelings before confronting them. We dont expect money from his mother but the sister uses her money for unnecessary articles of fashion. I dont want to live in that house because i am miserable and unhappy there. I do understand my husband saying that he must take care of his mother but he doesnt want to sell the house because he mother wont want to sell because her daughter is still staying there as well. My husband also doesnt want to be in the house anymore but is only thinking of his mother and i do understand. The problem is that i am so unhappy n miserable in that house and I dont wana live there anymore and i did inform my husband but what can he do to satisfy me (his wife) and his mother at the same time?. Who should he take care of first? Myself and my 2 baby sons or his mother?
Answer
Matters of the family are quite sensitive and if all parties involved do not put a concerted effort to resolve the situation it may be difficult to find a solution. From a religious point of view, the husband has an obligation to his wife and children first because he bound by the marriage contract that he entered. Taking care of his mother is a moral obligation but cannot be enforced. If you would like to live elsewhere it is your right to ask for such accommodations if it is feasible. The mother may stay at the present house with her daughter and your husband can still care for her. There are resolutions to everything if people are willing to commit themselves reasonably.
I hope this helps.
God knows best.